A hello and a welcome to you all.

God, it seems like AGES, doesn't it? Maybe it is ages. Yes, that's it - it HAS BEEN AGES!!!!!

Well, what can I say? Sorry it has taken so long to get this out. It saddens me that as I sit here typing away in the blazing June sunshine that even now that the vital first blow is being struck, it will yet be some time before you get to read it.

Still, this awful, oppressive guilt only serves to stem the tide of gay fripperies which would ordinarily scamper 'cross the page, so I shall try to shrug it off because firstly I know you're all kind forgiving people; and also because I know that scampering gay fripperies are what you want.

So here it is, unveiled before you, ALAN Tocopffaor Issue 3 Special "End-Of-An-Era" Edition!!!!

And what an issue it is. But what's the point of me sitting here telling you all about it when you can plunge recklessly forward and find out for yourself?

But be warned some of the things you may read might disturb you....

See you later.